Introduction
Some of us have had significant suffering in our lives. Others of us have experienced less suffering. How we deal with our suffering has a significant impact on our entire life, soul and body.
This inventory is only a tool. It is not meant to be a definitive diagnosis of suffering or woundedness. It is important that you work with someone on any unhealed suffering you uncover. Hopefully, this inventory assists you in this element of your spiritual journey.
Suffering without Christ leads to unhealed wounds. These wounds lead to passions such as anger, depression, anxiety, fear, jealousy, greed, gluttony and a host of potential addictions. They also develop a distorted, damaged, self-image.
Most of us tend to ignore or cover up our suffering, rather than facing it face to face. Our Lord met His suffering face-to-face. Christ’s suffering and resurrection transformed the world. Likewise, co-suffering with Christ heals our wounds, transforms, and grows us as a person.
Ironically, we may think negative experiences we had as young people did not cause us suffering. We think we are tougher than that. Unfortunately, many experiences did cause wounds that were never healed and have been festering inside us. When we ignore our suffering, it stunts our growth as a person and creates infected wounds that spread to many areas of life. These wounds usually manifest in various spiritual, mental and physical conditions.
This inventory is meant to help you become aware of suffering and unhealed wounds that may be buried. Many times, this suffering dates back to our younger years. We may have ignored or buried suffering during these periods to cope and survive. As you uncover suffering and wounds you have not considered for many years, bring your wounds to the Lord, your Spiritual Father/Mother, and/or a friend or counselor. Do not try and explore this alone. We need each other.
You will benefit greatly by meeting your suffering face-to-face and bringing it into God’s light for healing. Learning to co-suffer with Christ when you are hurting will deeply enrich your life. You can then experience the sanctifying potential that suffering can generate.
The inventory will also help you identify distortions you may have regarding your self-image. When we do not heal our wounds by suffering with Christ, we tend to internalize lies about who we are to our core. We tell ourselves stories about who we think we are, in order to make sense of the suffering. The problem is that these stories are false and demeaning to our person. We develop a dark and distorted image.
All human beings are made in the image of God, with every potential to grow into His likeness. Wounds distort our view of ourselves and convince us that we are flawed to the core. Our self-image can become so distorted, we cannot discern the difference between wounds, or sins that need repentance. Healing and growth becomes blocked.
Lastly, your inventory report will discuss approaches to healing your wounds. Healing takes time, however, the Lord can and does heal us. We reorient ourselves from self-esteem, to Christ-esteem. God willing, it will help you get on the path to repentance and growing in Christ-likeness. This path can grow the image of God in you to become a light to all those around you.
Four forms of suffering Exercise
Try and calm your mind and body to open your heart and life memories. Find a quiet place. Take your time on this reflection. Remember where you grew up. Recall where you played and with whom. Remember school and extracurricular activities. Think about how you experienced your upbringing in your family. Think about your relationship with your mom, dad, family members and relatives. Recall your friendships and relationships. Also ponder your life memories since those early years until today. Identify what brought you sadness, stress, fear, pain, frustration and anger. In essence, what caused suffering to you?
This is not meant to bring up difficult memories and blame our childhood or suffering for our troubles and circumstances. It is to acknowledge suffering that was never fully healed. Even in healthy families, suffering can be denied, buried, and ignored. This exercise is designed to help us explore these areas of life. Whether we have major suffering, or little suffering, it can lead to beautiful awareness and healing of the soul.
Again, take a break with some time and think about your life memories. Consider re-reading the above paragraphs. Then proceed with the inventory.
